Monday's have officially become my "work day". On Mondays the kids and I are "suppose" to do some deep cleaning. I put this word in quotes because it has been such a battle the past few weeks trying to get my "agenda" accomplished. Mondays have been a bit unproductive. The kids are doing their extra weekly chores but I hardly touch mine. What must be the problem?
Last Monday was plain awful. I don't know what was going on with me. I think it was hormones or something. I felt so moody. Nothing was pleasing me.....nothing at all. I called my husband in tears and he sweetly suggested...."Drop your plans, it's a beautiful day today and take the kids to the park." And I did just that. We went to our local park and had the kids run, and run, and run, and run, and run, and run, and run some more. We came home and everyone was tired and not ready to finish all those chores I had planned. Oh well.
That evening I was still in a funk. My hubby came home from work and suggest again...."You need to go out and take a drive" I did just that. You know what I did? I drove, and drove, and drove some more. I then parked at a nearby soccer park and just prayed and read my bible. I wanted so badly for this feeling to pass. I felt so frustrated and I couldn't stand it. After sitting there for about an hour, I started up the van and drove some more. Here is my conversation I had with the Lord....
Me: I don't know what to do Lord. I have so many ideas, so many agendas, and I really don't like being momzilla. I am sorry Father, there is no excuse for me to act and behave this way. Lord I just don't know how to stop this......(then I heard silence and then I heard the Lord)
Lord: Oh No Chris....don't you go there.... you know exactly what to do. Don't tell yourself you don't know. You do know. What would you tell a mom in a similar situation.
Me: (I didn't say anything...just thoughts crossed my mind and then I responded) You mean I need to tell you what I would tell another mom? Ok, I can do that. I think.
I put myself in the place of ministry at that moment---I was talking to myself!! LOL I know that sounds sort of crazy but I had to "preach" to myself. And you know what? I was so pumped and saw everything so clearly. You want to know what I told myself?
Me talking to Me: Love comes before your agenda. There are going to be distractions. There are going to be things that interrupt all the plans you might have laid out for the day. But what's most important is that you are ministering to those children in your home. It is a ministry unto their spirit. Nothing else is more important than ministering to your children in a loving way. So what if you only get one job on the list done. Again loving them comes before your agenda.
Also you need to be led by the Spirit of the Lord....don't be distracted by computer time (ouch) phone calls from friends (ouch and ouch), or whatever it is that pulls you from doing what God has called you to do. You have a calling and it is to train up your children as unto the Lord. You will rise early and every step shall be ordered of the Lord. So when you feel like "checking your emails"....don't go near that computer until you feel the Lord is releasing you to do that. You will find your fulfillment will come from keeping the agenda the Lord has given you.
Wow....I felt so much better telling myself this. All the weight I was carrying was off my shoulders. Thank you Jesus for your loving kindness and tender mercies.
So....if you happen to have "one of those days", don't fret just "preach" to yourself. What would you tell a mom or wife facing the same situation as you are at that moment? You will be amazed by what comes out of your mouth. What is coming out is the Words of the Lord to you and your situation.